Fade

“I’ll see you later, ” are your parting words as you disappear into the night …
They are also the words that ring inside my head in a song of remembrance …
I grasp onto them with childish glee as I wait patiently for your inevitable return …
My heart, in all of its radiance, ignores the dull warning from my head as I continue to wait …
Seconds turn into hours …
Hours turn into days …
Days turn into weeks …
And with those weeks, my heart starts to heed my mind’s warning gradually but it still holds its ingenuous hope that you’d return,
Screaming adamantly that you will return,
That you will remember,
That you wouldn’t forget,
Hoping with all its might that you won’t be another who got away …
So … holding onto to that bit of light left inside of it … the wait continues, but with a new pattern …
The scent of you starts to become stale as months replace weeks …
The shine in my eyes dulling as the new realization hits me slowly ….
Silent tears blurred the many words left behind that I now hold so dear … Turning the ink into watercolor stains upon paper …
I can’t even bring myself to sing anymore …
My heart now just a shattered object even though it is beating with every breath I have inside the hollow shell my body has become…
It doesn’t replace the feeling of loss at being forgotten …
At finally realizing that I’m essentially a second option for you …
That you didn’t truly care and probably never did care for me as much as I did for you …
And all I have left are memories that’ll replay over and over, until they begin to fade away as did everything else of yours that I have ….
But how soon will it be that this feeling of hopeless fade away to nothing?
Fade away and fill back up with the light you stole from me essentially …
Because even though it will eventually fade away, my heart will never be the same as before ….

 

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